When my husband finally asked me to marry him, I was overcome with bridal joy. I had finally nabbed a keeper—tall, dark, good looking, and he was fully employed. Life couldn’t have been brighter, until the day I was faced with five words every bride-to-be ultimately hears, “Have you set a date?”

It wasn’t long before the interrogation began, “Have you started planning?”, “What’s your budget?” and the true panic attack inducer, “Have you finished your guest list?” But, it was glancing through a 250 page wedding planner which included a suggestion for interviewing caterers up to 541 days in advance that ultimately sealed our fate. This wedding planning business was not for me, so six months later, we eloped.

I’m not talking destination wedding, I’m talking full-blown, run off to a secluded beach to get married in our bare feet wedding. We didn’t tell a soul, and our only guests were a couple from Italy we had met the day before. For us, that afternoon on the beach was more romantic than any six-figure event I could have imagined, and we did it all for less than $5,000.

Sneaking off to a Caribbean island may not be right for everyone. The nuclear fallout from family members alone should cause any bride-to-be to carefully weigh all her options before boarding a puddle jumper to Mexico. Yet, if you’re seriously contemplating whether or not to jetset outta town for your big day, you might want to consider a few basics first.

Hightailing It

Eloping, while incredibly romantic and personal, can have its repercussions. First off, people get miffed. Whether it’s family, friends or the lady who cuts your hair, somebody’s going to feel left out, so weigh this option carefully before pulling the plug on your wedding. You know your family better than anyone, so ask yourself if it’s really in everyone’s best interest, especially your own, to take off without warning. Also, you can forget wedding gifts since you’ve chosen to forgo a traditional registry and peeved a bunch of people off, so if you’re looking to score the goods, eloping may not be best way to go.

Yet, there are upsides. Eloping costs next to nothing in comparison to the average traditional wedding, there’s virtually no planning involved, and as you say your vows, you’ll be able to gaze into your future hubby’s eyes without worrying about the florist standing you up. Plus, any angry relatives can usually be appeased with a generous post-wedding party back at home.

Destined for a Destination Wedding?

Destination weddings are stuck in nuptial purgatory, somewhere in between the exhilaration of eloping and the frustration of planning a traditional wedding. Scurrying away to an exotic white sand beach may sound enticing, but couples should remember that, along with conventional wedding planning (i.e. reception, dress, flowers, cake, etc…) you’ll need to research marriage laws for your destination, arrange travel for your guests, manage a larger budget, and decide whether you really want to spend your entire honeymoon entertaining twenty people. Hiring an on-site wedding consultant or arranging everything through a hotel will certainly help, and jaunting off to a nearby island for some private honeymoon time is not unheard of, but in the end, a destination wedding will require more money and more work.

Whatever your preference, just remember that it’s yours. Weddings are ultimately about celebrating love, so when your sweetie finally pops the question and you, in turn, get hammered with questions, take a deep breath, and consider what works best for the both of you.